How Do I Know If Therapy Is Working? Signs Counseling Is Helping

Many people wonder early on in therapy whether it is actually working. It can be hard to evaluate as a client because you are still getting to know your therapist, building trust, and learning about their therapeutic approach. One of the hidden truths of therapy is that it is not a quick fix, and progress is often subtle, especially at the beginning. That said, it is completely fair to step away from a therapeutic relationship if it isn’t genuinely helping you.

In this post, we’ll explore why this question comes up so often. We’ll also highlight some signs that therapy is helpful, especially in the early stages. Whether you’re looking for virtual therapy in Michigan or in-person counseling, knowing these signs can help you feel more confident in your journey.

Why This Question Comes Up So Often

This question comes up a lot, and it’s completely normal to wonder if therapy is working. Expectations don’t always match how therapy really works. Progress usually happens slowly. Social media, TV, and movies often make it seem like therapy is all “major breakthroughs,” but most sessions are actually about building skills, trust, and insight. Those small steps eventually lead to bigger breakthroughs.

Sometimes you might even feel worse before you feel better. That’s normal. It happens because therapy can bring up emotions you’ve been avoiding for a long time. It can be really helpful to check in on your progress and re-evaluate the benefits along the way. Below are some signs that therapy is helping, even when it doesn’t feel obvious.

Sign #1: You’re More Aware (Even If You Don’t Like It Yet)

Being more aware and making a habit of observing yourself are key foundations for breakthroughs in therapy down the road. Noticing your emotions, automatic thoughts, or nervous system responses are all signals that give you important information for deeper work. Many of us go through life ignoring these signals or not realizing they indicate something bigger is going on.

So, if you’re in therapy and starting to notice your patterns, triggers, emotional responses, or thought loops—therapy is working! Becoming more aware helps you incorporate skills, slow things down, and respond more intentionally. The catch with becoming more aware is that it can feel uncomfortable at first. Facing behaviors or emotions you’ve been avoiding can sometimes feel overwhelming and bring up strong emotions. That’s normal and actually a sign that meaningful progress is happening.

Sign #2: Your Reactions Are Slowing Down

If you are noticing patterns and starting to pause before responding, that is progress. Moving from reacting to responding is a clear sign that therapy is helping. This kind of awareness, mindfulness, and impulse control can gradually improve mood regulation and decision-making over time.

Sign #3: You’re Thinking About Situations Differently

Starting to reflect on situations differently is a sign of growth. You may notice patterns where you tend to make assumptions, are hard on yourself, or people-please. Beginning to think about situations in new ways, such as considering alternative perspectives or challenging unhelpful automatic thoughts, is a clear sign that therapy is starting to help. Leading with curiosity to understand why you act a certain way and whether it is helpful is the type of skillset that supports progress toward any therapy goals.

Sign #4: Your Boundaries Are Shifting

You may be starting to notice areas in your life where you are shifting your boundaries. It can feel uncomfortable at first, but these changes help relieve stress and reduce unhealthy patterns. This might mean adjusting boundaries around your work hours or how you handle work phone calls. It could also involve shifting boundaries with friends, family, or your partner. This act of setting and adjusting boundaries is a way of taking care of yourself in ways you may not be used to. Therapy can support this process by validating the need for a boundary shift to make long-term progress.

Sign #5: You’re Talking About Things You’ve Avoided Before

It can be hard to talk to a stranger about the deep, difficult things we sometimes avoid even facing ourselves. If you find yourself able to identify emotions you couldn’t before, that is real progress. Bringing in real-life examples from your day-to-day life and gradually becoming more vulnerable are signs that the rapport with your therapist is growing.

In the early stages of therapy, you have to build trust with your therapist. If you are starting to open up about things that bring up uncomfortable emotions, this is a sign that therapy is helping. Feeling safe enough to explore deeper topics shows that your therapeutic relationship is supporting your growth and progress.

Sign #6: You’re Using Skills Outside of Therapy

Trying out skills you’ve learned in therapy is progress. This is true even if you don’t do them perfectly or see immediate results. This shows you are experimenting with what you are learning. It also allows you to collaborate with your therapist about what works and what doesn’t. Simply being willing to try a skill is meaningful. It means you are beginning to make real changes, even if they feel small at first.

Sign #7: Your Goals Are Changing

Within your first few sessions with a therapist, you typically set goals for your time together. At first, these goals may feel broad or relatively “safe” as you build comfort and trust. Over time, it often becomes easier to explore your goals more in-depth.

If your goals begin to shift beyond simply coping with symptoms and toward understanding patterns or making meaningful changes, that is a sign that therapy is helping. This kind of goal evolution often reflects increased insight and a stronger sense of safety within your therapy sessions.

What Progress in Therapy Usually Does Not Look Like

Many people have a specific idea of what therapy progress is supposed to look like. Some hope it will magically change everything. Because of that, it can be helpful to name what progress in therapy does not look like.

Progress in therapy does not mean:

• Feeling “fixed”

• Immediate or constant relief

• Nothing bothering you anymore

• Never feeling anxious or triggered

• Loving every therapy session

• Constant progress with no setbacks

There are a lot of therapy clichés that can sound corny, but they are true. One of the biggest is that progress is not linear. There will be times when you regress, mess up, or take a wrong turn. That is part of the work. It is how skills are built and resilience grows.

Sometimes therapy can feel hard or uncomfortable. At times, it might even kind of suck. That does not mean therapy is not working. Often, growth and healing happen on the other side of discomfort. Feeling challenged can be a sign that therapy is helping.

When It Might Be Time to Talk to Your Therapist

With all of this in mind, there are times when therapy may not be working or you may feel stalled in your progress with your therapist. That experience is completely valid. It may be helpful to talk with your therapist about your therapy progress and overall fit if:

• You feel unsure how their current approach supports your therapy goals

• Sessions feel repetitive and you are not gaining new insight

• You do not feel safe or understood by your therapist

It is completely normal and appropriate to bring up doubts about your therapy progress or the work you are doing together. Therapy is a collaborative relationship. Talking openly about these concerns can bring clarity for both you and your therapist and help determine the best next steps in your treatment.

How Long Does It Take for Therapy to Work?

The length of therapy depends on your goals and the severity of your symptoms. Some people come in with very specific goals that work well with short-term or solution-focused therapy. Others have concerns with many layers. Those often take more time to explore and work through. The reason you start therapy can influence how long treatment lasts.

Your pace in therapy can also depend on how comfortable you feel trying things outside of sessions. Practicing skills and bringing back what feels helpful or unhelpful supports progress. For some people, more time is needed to build trust first. That can slow things down at the beginning, and that’s okay.

The type of therapy approach also matters. Some modalities focus more on talking and skill-building. Others spend more time processing experiences in the body or revisiting past memories. There are many factors that shape how long therapy lasts.

What matters most is checking in regularly with your therapist. This includes talking about progress, adjusting goals, and noticing when therapy feels less needed. As progress is being made towards goals, I like to talk with clients about when it may make sense to space out sessions or taper the frequency of appointments. The length of therapy should never feel rushed or forced. It should feel collaborative, supportive, and aligned with your needs.

Looking for Therapy That Feels Supportive? Contact Create Wellness Counseling

Progress in therapy often shows up as gradual, small changes that lead to more sustainable growth over time. Most importantly, talking openly with your therapist about any concerns or worries you have about your progress really matters.

If you’re looking for therapy that feels supportive and collaborative, you’re welcome to complete my contact form or schedule a consultation through my online scheduler.